Catnip Casanova
by Poette O'Deal
Summary: After signing on to a bet,Po gets a new cologne to win. Only now Tigress is acting uber strange around him. Sighing,hugging him,wanting to be extremely close to him.It's all scaring the panda and everyone else. Could it be love or an old foe's revenge?
1. Chapter 1

**Author Note: I own nothing! this idea just came to me out of the blue one day..and I told my bestfriend and then she said that she's going to send it to Dreamworks and try to get it made into an episode of Legends of Awesomeness...I begged her not too...and so far she's forgotten...but she could remember at any moment. I really don't think its that good an idea...it just came to me. Anyway I'm posting my version here to get it out of my system. I did a lot of research on catnip and what you read below should be true and if not sorry. Enjoy! **

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><p><strong><em>*Catnip Casanova*<em>**

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><p><em><strong>Catnip:<strong> A perennial herb of the mint family and, when given to the right cat, can cause the cat to rub it, roll over, kick at it, lick it, eat it, growl at it and go nuts for several minutes. When sniffed it simulates a cat, but when eaten acts like a seditive. After a while the cat will grow bored and walk away from it then come back to it about two hours later, getting hyped up again. Many effects very from cat to cat. Large cats, like tigers, can be sensitive to it as well._

_**Casanova:** a man who is romantically attentive to and compassionate about women...aka a player _

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><p>Po was in the kitchen humming an upbeat tune, cooking up some Secret Ingredient soup for himself and the other residents of the Jade Palace. Po was giving off an aura of confidence...even though he had no clue what an aura is.<p>

You see, our not-so-bright Dragon Warrior had unwittingly made a bet with Crane, Mantis, and Monkey that if he could get Tigress to be...civil-asking for Tigress to be nice to a single person for an entire day was too much...a mission to Mars really- then the three of them would be his servants for an entire month. The time limit was set to a week.

Po either had an ace up his sleeve or weas plain stupid... most likly the latter.

Po, however, was feeling extremly confident that he could get Tigress to be civil to him for one day...

...and the final day to accomplish this task was tomorrow.

So...plain stupid...yes.

After many painful days of failed attempts Po had finally figured what better way to make a girl happy than make her fav meal in the morning...

..unfortunatly, Po didn't know her favorite food so he made his favortie: Secret Ingredient soup and fried rice balls.

Humming his happy tune, he heard the gong ring and a muffled "Good morning, Master" coming from the barracks along with a "Panda, wake-up!" Setting the table for breakfast, he heard his door being slid open and a "Where is Po?" followed by a chorus of I don't knows from the Five. Then came the sound of several feet going off in different directions. They were looking for him...

...perfect.

As he was just finishing up the table, Po heard a familiar sound of padded feet coming down the hall. Tigress had decided to search the kitchen.

"Po?" a familiar female voice called out. He could tell thast her vioce had a mixture of concern...and anger.

He could tell though without looking up at her that she was ticked when she found where he was. Not angry yet, but getting there. Po knew he had to act fast or today would be down the toilet...like all the others.

"Po...next time leave a note when you finally decide to get up in the mornings," Tigress said and then yelled to the others that Po was in the kitchen.

"Tigress...catch!" Acting quick, Tigress caught what Po had thrown at her...a rice ball.

Looking down at the rice ball, she looked over at Po, who was grining a goofy...Po grin and shrugged, heard the others heading to the kitchen, and sat down.

They waited as the others sat down before ewating. Today looked good for Po so far, he and Tigress actually had a conversation without him getting on her nerves. It was still early though...anything could happen...

...especially if one team has a small bug-Mantis-on their side.

Master Shifu went off to meditate while the others ate..gving Mantis the perfect opportunity to sneak u on Po with out their master getting suspious. Shifu wasn't very tolerant of "Childish games" like dares or bets.

"...mmmm! Po this meal is very good..." Tigress told Po, swiping seconds before Po got a chance to take it all.

Po beamed at her compliment and said, "Thanks Tigress!" and when Tigress wasn't looking sent a smirk over to the guys.

That's when Mantis acted out his plan.

Po started to speak, "You know Tigress if you told me what your favorite food was I could make it for yo-oof!" Po's leg suddenly jerked...kicking Tigress in her shin.

The know angry Tigress growled at Po.

"Po..."

"Sorry, I don't know what happened...my leg just jerked out from under me." Po was getting frantic now...this could totally ruin today.

"WHA!" Po's arm suddenly jerked out...causing him to through his food at...

...Tigress...

While she dodged a majority of it, a piping hot bowl of soup _hit_ her...soaking her fur with broth and noodles.

Tigress was _not_ happy.

_"Po..." _the tiger master said in a tight voice.

"I really didn't mean to do that...my arm had a freak spasm!" Po was beyond frantic now.

"Whatever!" Tigress was mad know...so that was another day...wasted before it really began. Tigress stormed out of the room, probably to clean herself up..

Crane, Monkey, and Mantis grinned taubtingly at Po, while Viper just shook her head and said, "Real mature, guys."

Po had only one more day.

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><p>"Great now what am I going to do?" Po said a loud as he walked throught the market place. After breakfast it sparring day and of course Po was stuck with Tigress. She really showed no mercy on him today...Po was fairly certain that he wouldn't be able to sit for a week.<p>

"Great...now I only have tomorrow left...how am I going to get her to be ...civil to me at least," Po sighed

"You," a strange sounding woman's voice said.

Po looked around and saw a sheep lady looking at him...not blinking.

"Who..me?" Po asked pointing to himself.

"Yes..you panda...Over here...I have something that might interest you...," she said without emotion..as though she were hypnotised. Po was to frantic to pay much attention though and walked over to her stand.

"Sure...whatcha got?"

"You are trying to impress a girl..right?"

"Yes..well sorta...I woundn't say impress as mush as trying to get her at least be civil to me for one day."

"Well then try this new cologne," She held up a small bottle full of a green tinted liquid.

"Cologne..." Po then smelled his arm pit and gagged.

"Whew... I may need that for other reasons as well!" Po said. "So exactly what is that stuff suppose to do?"

"It makes you absolutly irrestable to the right girl...or so that's what the creator said."

Po thought about it for a moment and said, "I guess it's worth a shot. How much is it?"

"Oh, for you Dragon Warrior it's free." She shoved the bottle at him, "Here take it."

"Really, thanks..." Po then noticed her glowing red eyes, "You okay... you look like your getting a cold or something. Why don't you go see healer or something."

"You're right...I will."

Po then walked away from the cart.

Once he was gone, the sheep lady stood staring at where the panda had just been andf then began to speak in that monotone...uh tone, "Did I do well Master?"

"Yes," an elder woman's voice said, "you did very well." From out underneath the shadows Scorpion crawled onto the sheep's shoulder and snickered. "Let's just see how the Dragon Warrior's lady friend likes that **_catnip_** spiked cologne he just recieved."

Then she started to laugh and then crawled away from her slave.

The sheep waited a few moments before asking, "Master?"

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><p><strong>Whatcha think? Good start...ehhh...it was bad...give me info please. Also I want ot know what you would think about me writing a KFP story with this title, <em>A Winter Festival Carol <em>inspired be Charles Dickens _A Christmas Carol_. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Author note: I'm so sorry for my disapearence. Really I am! My computer's go a virus and it took forever to find this, plus school, homelife, plain old writer's block, and classic lazyness. Plus I had kinda strayed in my faith...but the Lord forgives and I'm back!**

**Wow...30 reviews for the first chapter...awesome. And people don't hate on LOA. Ye the movies are better but must I remind you that one its a kids show(rated Y-7), two the show is a spin off which are never as good as the origonal and three the wrtier are really probably trying their best like all of who write fanfiction. I mean some of you seem tobe basing the characters personalities on fanfiction. Sure they might be a bit off in the show-at least to what you think...but every TV show, movie, and book have those moments.**

**Enjoy!**

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><p><em><strong>*Catnip Casanova*<strong>_

The next morning the gong rung through the barracks waking five of its six occupants to greet their master. You can guess who the straggler was…

"Panda!" an annoyed Shifu yelled marching to the panda's door.

Grumbling something about the panda under his breath, Shifu prepared to open the panda's bedroom door and drag the oaf and push him into the obstacle course if he was still asleep.

He was just about to slide the door open when _whoosh! _the door suddenly opened and the red panda was plowed into by something black and white.

"I-I am up! I'm up!" the panda then looked around and saw a rather angry Shifu and slightly annoyed Tigress staring back at him. "…oops…" the rest of the Five- namely the guys- were attempting to hold in there laughter.

_I almost disqualified myself today! Crap-sack! Okay Po, calm down. She's just irked. You haven't lost yet. Remember you've still got the secret weapon!_

"Just get into the training hall Panda. And do try to wake up on _time_, _tomorrow!_"Shifu said sternly, in a tone that suggested that if he didn't there would be hell to pay.

Gulping the panda nodded and followed the others out to the training hall. He quietly (for once) scampered back to his room and quickly grabbed the cologne the strange sheep had given him.

He knew he would need it.

**Kung Fu Panda**

After training Shifu generously let them have the rest of the day off-granted that they knew they would have to work harder the next day.

Po didn't mind sense he could now use this time to talk to Tigress.

First things first…he had to find her.

He looked everywhere. The barracks, the kitchen, the village…no, no, no. The bathhouse…uh…he stayed outside and waited for twenty minutes for that. Monkey walked by while he was waiting and said, "Tic, tock, tic, tock…"

The panda then stalked off and then it suddenly hit her where she would be…the Peach Tree of Heavenly Wisdom! It was the only place he hadn't checked, so, by default, she had to be there.

_I mean it's not like she suddenly got sucked into a universe portal…_the panda stopped his running toward the peach tree to ponder this thought for a moment, _is that possible?…if it was it would be __**awesome!**__ Wait! Stop it, Po! Stay focused!_

He continued his climb to the peach tree, since that was now what he was doing by now…crawling up the hill. Yeah…Dragon Warriors past-if there were-were most likely sweat dropping at the panda's lack of stamina.

By the time he made it up the hill he was panting so hard he was surprised that Tigress was even still there. But, thankfully, she was. The master of tiger style was sitting under the shade of the tree meditating. Po stood in awe for a moment or two…she never looked so peaceful before…at least not around him anyway.

He quickly remembered the cologne. He quickly dabbed some on, then some more, then just one more for luck all of his chest. The extra doses were partly from anxiety and partly from the fact that it had a very strange scent that he couldn't figure out…he thought he might be able to identify it with more cologne on…still couldn't figure it out.

The panda slowly approached Tigress not waning to disturb her. He wanted her to stay that way for a while longer…seeing him at peace…gave him a bit of peace.

He was nearing the tree itself when Tigress spoke.

"What do you want panda?" Tigress asked in a tight voice.

Po jumped in fear and shock and stuttered nonsense trying to come up with something even remotely interesting to talk about.

Po's mind came up with nada.

Tigress sighed and said, "If you were going to play your roll in that _bet_ between you and the boys I suggest you leave now panda."

Po froze right at that instant, _she knew! I'm dead! Ten feet underground!_

Po continued to freak out in his head as a light breeze blew from behind him toward Tigress.

Growing aggravated that the panda wasn't leaving Tigress was about to warn him again when a delightful fragrance entered her nose.

Her eyes dilated.

_Mmmmmm…, _Tigress thought,_ what a lovely fragrance…but where is it coming from?…certainly not from…!_ She sneaked a glance at the panda behind…and **grinned! **_He's not actually all that bad looking…kind of handsome actually…_ Having now totally turned around to face the panda-albeit still grinning, which was freaking him out!-Tigress's eyes landed on his stomach. _He's not that fat…just really fluffy I bet!_

She didn't question this sudden change in prospective…she gladly embraced it actually.

"_Oh Po…" _Tigress called to him in a _flirty _tone. Po didn't notice it however, he was still freaked out over her sudden Cheshire cat grin.

He gulped and answered, "Yes Tigress?" His voice was shaky.

"Aren't you going to sit with me?" she patted the ground next to her and _winked_ at the panda.

_Wait! What!_ The panda was now extremely confused. First she tells him to go away, now she wants him to stay.

"Um…didn't you just tell me to…yanno…leave…" he stuttered.

Tigress feigned hurt then and said, "So you don't want to stay?" She expanded her eyes and titled her head.

Po felt heat rush to his face. What the heck was up with Tigress…oh well…this just might make the bet easier.

He shrugged his shoulders, "I'll stay…if you want me to…"

Tigress grinned but didn't say anything, instead she gestured next to herself for the panda to sit.

And sure enough the panda did sit next to her-at a respectable distance of course. This caused Tigress to pout and she slowly slid closer to him, distracting him by pointing out the view.

"It's very lovely out here, isn't it?" Tigress asked inching closer.

"Are you kidding me, it's awesome!" Po exclaimed throwing a fist in the air. Tigress still inched closer, rolling her eyes at the panda's enthusiasm.

"Yeah…awesome. But I mean it just feels like something might happen…a kind of magic or mystery in the air, don't you think?" Closer still she scooted.

"Ummm… I guess so. The day feels pret-" Po stopped his sentence cold in its tracks when he felt something-rather someone-furry lean on his shoulder. A small sigh escaped the creatures lips. Her turned slowly to see it was Tigress _snuggling _up against him.

After leaning on him, Tigress then snaked her arm through the panda's arm and rubbed her head against his upper arm. Her tail also had made its way around the panda's back and itself around his torso.

Po gulped and gently asked, "Tigress…are you feeling okay?"

Tigress ignored his question and continue to cuddle the horror stuck panda and she soon started to purr like crazy and sigh heavily.

Tigress's fun soon ended when she suddenly fell on her side. Confused she looked around to see the panda running away, beat red in the face. She grinned thinking to herself,

_So it a cat and mouse is it Panda?_

Embracing her new found playfulness she let him have a bit more of a head start.

**Kung Fu Panda**

Po was running for his life. Tigress had extremely freaked him out.

_What do I do?_

He though for a moment while coughing his breath. That's when it hit him.

_Of course, that perfect he should be able to tell me what's going on!_

Po ran to find to find a certain hopeless romantic/pervert/smarter-than-Monkey insect.

**Kung Fu Panda**

All the while Scorpion was watching the whole fiasco at home with her basin.

"Perfect…its stronger than I expected…"

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><p><strong>Please review! And pardon my slight anger at the top but...well yanno...<strong>

**Bye!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Author note: I own nothing! Anyway glad y'all liked it! Yesterday was my birthday XD (3/19)! How old am I? I'm...negative 200 years old! No, I'm revealling my age! This is the next chap! Hope you like it!...**

**Quick question...where s everyone coming up with all these Viper pairings? Like Viper/Crane and Viper/Mantis and Viper/Monkey. Is it just made up or did I miss something that could hint at that. I could see Crane/Mei Ling a bit more after watching _Secrets of the Furious Five _and then was Bai Li in "Has Been Hero" but I honestly don't see where some of you guys are getting these other pairings. Heck! I've barely seen them interact! **

**Just wondering...and why's everyone making Mantis a pervert. It's funny and I slightly mention it in the last chap, but he seems to be much more of a hopeless romantic. It even showed abit in the second movie, not just in the _Legends of Awesomeness._**

**Just wondering...enjoy!**

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><p><em><strong>*<strong>__**Catnip Casanova***_

In the kitchen four of the Furious Five sat, eating and talking. Monkey was sitting by the hole in the wall that he had accidentally made while trying to make a dumpling…you _really _do not want to know!

"I should probably patch this up _before _Shifu sees…" the primate muttered to himself.

"Ya think," Mantis replied bluntly finishing of a dumpling he had stashed away _before _Monkey tried to cook.

Crane and Viper were off to the side shaking their heads in embarrassment when a loud rumbling sound suddenly sounded its way through the kitchen-_shaking the entire foundation! _None of them knew what it was…but what ever _it_ was was getting closer.

"What the-?" Mantis couldn't even finish the thought when a blur of black and white crashed into the kitchen, bouncing everyone around in the kitchen and nearly falling through the hole itself.

The blur-being Po-was not used to ever running that fast before an was alternating between panting, coughing and mumbling a bunch a gibberish that absolutely no sense.

After gathering themselves from the rumble the Five (minus Tigress) went to check out on their freaked out friend.

"Po…Po…Po!"

"Hey are you okay?"

"What happened?"

"Did you make Tigress mad?"

Po started to calm down a bit and Tigress's name helped him get out what he was trying to say.

"Ohmygosh,ohmygosh!IthinkTigresshasacrushonme!Me!" he yelled in a rush…he said more but it sounded more like random sounds than coherent words.

There was a moment of silence as they digested what Po had just said. Monkey was the first to speak up.

"That's crazy talk Po. I should know, I'm fluent."

"Umm…you already said that, but it's still true," Mantis said trying to wrap his mind around what Po had just told them.

"Whatever, but still Tigress isn't the _type _for love. She's tried to avoid it as much as possible ever since she was thirteen and had that crush on Master Shifu…ugh," Monkey took a moment to grimace at that before continuing, "anyway you probably just hit your head on something hard…you tend to do that a lot you know."

"Monkey's right Po…as disturbing as that back story is…he's still right. Tigress hates crushes. Whether it's being on the receiving end or having the crush herself," Crane said.

"Yeah. You probably just got hit in the head…you tend to fall a lot," Monkey reasoned.

"Guy's I'm serious!" Po was getting ticked. He was about to say something more when he thought he heard someone down the hall. He quickly looked up and down the hall…

…nothing…

"Uh…Po, you okay?" Viper asked, concerned for his well being. He seemed kind of out of it recently.

"Huh?…oh it's nothing-"

"So I'm nothing now am I?" a familiar voice pouted. Jumping, Po quickly turned to see Tigress now directly in front of him, faking a pout. Very well actually.

"Oh…hey Tigress…uh…about a while ago…huh?" that's when he noticed that her eyes looked strange. They were dilated strangely and she looked rather peaceful.

"You feeling okay Tigress?" he asked placing a paw on her forehead. Tigress was notorious for covering up things like sickness, a broken bone, internal bleeding, etc. just so she could train more.

Nope. No fever. Cool as a cucumber…well other than some sweat left over from training…but that's different.

"Nope, I'm peachy keen." Tigress said hyperly **(Probably not a word…sue me.)** and smiled sweetly. Yanno big smile, not the toothy kind, and eyes closed.

Everyone froze. Tigress _never _said things like _peachy keen_ and would more likely tackle Po than smile at him.

Po still had hi hand on her forehead when he heard a low rumbling. It was Tigress…she was purring and leaning her head into Po's open hand.

She then looked up at him with her dilated eyes and asked, "Po…," she said slowly. "Maybe since Master's given us the day off…" she trailed off bringing her own two arms around his slightly larger one, leaning against him and nuzzling her muzzle into his fur…gathering more of the scent that had spellbound her.

"Po…I was thinking that maybe you can show me around town…through your eyes. Please?" she coyly played with the bit of fur that stuck out on top of the panda's head, so her breathing lightly danced across his neck.

"Uhhhh…ummmm…sure-oof!" Tigress suddenly tackled the panda in a bear hug, cutting off his air supply.

"Purrrrfect! I'll be waiting at the steps in an hour." She ran to the door and stopped in the doorway, "oh, and please try not to be late like you are for the gong." She vanished into the barracks…-_humming!_

Everyone in the kitchen was dead silent until a dumbfounded Po spoke up.

"What just happened?"

"Call me crazy but I think you just got asked out by Tigress," said Monkey, with the others slowly nodding.

"And you said yes," Mantis chirped in.

"Right…what do I do?" Po ban banged his head against a wall.

"Not that," Mantis walked over and shoved the panda into a chair. "Okay you got yourself into this…so you going to have to either get yourself out or play along."

"If by get myself out you mean cancel, no way. Just imagine what she'd do to me if I stood her up. I kinda like life thank you very much."

"Alright, alright," Mantis said. "Your just going to have to play along then. And I've got a plan." Everyone huddled around as Mantis whispered his plan.

**Kung Fu Panda**

Master Shifu walked out of Hall of Warriors to be greeted by a very unusual sight. Tigress spinning around in the courtyard, humming to herself, and hold a punch of pink flowers in her hand picking off the petals whispering to herself: _he loves me, he loves a lot, he loves me, he loves me a lot, he loves me…_

Shifu's eye twitched seeing his most prized pupil-and daughter but that's never been addressed in the show and only for about a minute in the first movie- acting so love struck.

Coughing, he tried to get her attention…unfortunately he failed at doing so. Tigress was too wrapped up in weaving the flowers into a crown now. He coughed again, but still she ignored him. A third time he tried and she still ignored him. She simply placed her finished crown on her head and started to work on small flower rings to slip on her tail and four bracelets for her wrists and ankles **(Wow is she out of it).**

"_Tigress!"_

That got her attention, jumping she turned to her Master and reverted back into her natural nature. "Master," she bowed.

Shifu hesitated for a moment, "Might I ask what you're doing exactly, Tigress?"

With that Tigress went back to being the lovesick kitten he saw only moments ago. With a large smile she said, "I'm getting ready for my date!"

Shifu nearly passed out. _Date!_ Since when did Tigress go on _dates_.

"Really?" Shifu tried to mask his shock, but failed miserably. It took all his strength to even ask the next part, "With whom?"

Smiling, she said, "Po."

With that Shifu nodded, went to his room, shut the door, and almost fainted. The only thing that kept him from passing out was the fact that their was a panda that would be in some serious hot water before the night's end.

Something scurried around in his room. He immediately stood ready. Again it scurried. Shifu perked his ears up ready to stop who ever was trespassing in _his_ room.

He listened intently. Waiting…

…

…

…

_Creeck!_

Immediately he threw his flute at the intruder, bringing her out of hiding.

"Scorpion!"

"Well hello Shifu. Long time no see," she said curtly.

"Not long enough."

With that Scorpion lunged at Shifu who dodged and who then-carefully-grabbed her by the tail and swung her into the ground.

"Last time I checked, Scorpion, you were banished by Master Oogway…what business brings you here?" Shifu asked sternly.

"Oh, nothing just checking to see how the Dragon Warrior enjoyed the _gift _gave him."

Shifu perked up at that, "What gift?"

"Oh, nothing special. Just a small bottle of _catnip _induced cologne that I'm sure your tiger student finds absolutely irresistible." Scorpion relished the look in the Grandmaster's face. Twitchy-twitch

**"_WHAT!"_**

Suddenly the door opened to show Zeng who must have heard noises from outside.

"Zeng! Quickly alert the others that Scorpion is her-"

_Clang!_

Master Shifu fell to the floor in a heap with Zeng standing by hold a wok in his hands.

His eyes were glowing red.

"About time you got here. He was starting to get on my nerves. Well we best find someplace to look him up." Scorpion crawled out of the room, dragging Shifu with her, leaving Zeng standing in the doorway.

When Zeng was alone he said to no one, "Master?"

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><p><strong>Review please! <strong>

**Oh yeah I was watching _Secrets of the Masters_ and I caught some banter at the begining and it made me wonder. The special only includes Tigress, Mantis, and Po at this point. Monkey, Crane, and, Viper aren't in it at all. Pay very good attention to the underlined lines and the italisized lines hold some signifigance as well. Here it is:**

**Mantis: Keep it down**

**Po: Hurry we're running out of time**

**Tigress: Whose hand is that?**

**Manits: _I don't even have hands_**

**Po: Quiet! You'll compromise the mission**

**Mantis:** _**But, seriously, do I look like I have hands**_

_**Hmmmmm...maybe we don't know Po that well after all. Do with that what you will.**_

_**God bless all of you! Reveiw please!**_


	4. Chapter 4

**__Author note: I own nothing!**

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><p><strong><em>*Catnip Casanova*<em>**

"Are you sure this is going to work Mantis?" Po asked nervously as fingered the bouquet Viper had gathered for his...gulp...date.

"Positive. Now quit figiting, your making me nervous."

"Tell why I shouldn't be nervous when I'm about to go on a date with _Tigress_. Yanno Tigress, Master of the Tiger Style, who would probably kill me if I act like an idiot today." Po startred paceing and muttering unintelligable things under his breath like a crazy person.

"Po!" Viper immedialty slapped him with her tail, waking him up from his neurotic fest.

"What? Thanks Viper!"

Mantis hopped on his shoulder, "Yeah man, at least you didn't hit on her on your first day at the palace."

Po looked at the bug in shock. _"You what?"_

Mantis smiled sheepishly. "Yeah...not my best move...couldn't sit for a week."

"Yeah the closest you came to that was when your evil half hit on her...three times actually," Crane said.

"Right...wait! Does that still count as me? Or not?"

"I have no clue."

"How about we get back on to the task at hand, boys?" Viper asked, slightly exhasperated.

"Right!"

"So how do I look?" Po looked down at the new pants Mantis had him change into. Because the patch-work look just wasn't covering it. They were smooth and a dark gray that Viper said was charcole and a the waist band had a dark green dragon trainling across it.

"You look great...and your running late!" Mantis yelped.

"Yikes! Wait just one thing." Po then pulled out the cologne bottle and put some more on...he felt like he would need it. Before he knew it he had used up the entire freaking bottle!

"Oof! Po too much! Too much," Mantis said as he and the others caughed a bit.

"Really?"

"Yes...," Viper said, "but its too late to do anything about it! Your really late now!"

"Go go go go go!"

"Alright! Alright!" Po yelled as he was shoved through the door by the others. He ran outside so quickly they all fell onto the floor causing Po to look back and laugh.

"And that's what happens when you shove...the...Dragon...whoa..." he trailed off when he saw the feline infront of him.

"What? What is it Po-" Viper and the others looked around Po to see Tigress. At least they thought it was Tigress.

"Whoa..," the others repeated.

"Well," Tigress asked coyly, "what do you think Po."

"I think...you look...wow...so...so...awesome...," he sighed (think of like in the first movie when she did that split in the air).

None of them could believe it. Tigress was wearing... PINK! She had a crown of pink tiger lilies and fire pinks on her head and bracelets made of them on her wrists and ankles. Her fur was well groomed, making it look soft and silky. She looked like a forest spirit.

So. Much. Pink(Fire pinks are actually pinkish-red). But it wasn't overdone or flashy...it looked sweet and innocent-still her age but happier than they'ld ever seen her.

"Thank you Dragon Warrior."

He suddenly remembered the bouquet and nerviously held them out to her.

"T-these a-ar-are for yo-u," he stuttered.

Tigress grinned and took the bouquet, sniffing them. "Hmmmm. Thank you Po. They're lovely."

She then aggressively latched onto his arm, dragging him to the valley.

"Com'on!" she whined-actually whined-, "let's get outta here, Po! The seriousness of this place is suffocating me!"

The rest of the Five watched in a mixture of awe and shock as Tigress dragged Po down the thousand steps.

"Whoa..."

**Kung Fu Panda**

Shifu groggily woke up. He didn't know where he was, someplace outside and in the open. How did he get here? Suddenly it all hit him like a ton of bricks. Tigress. The flowers. Po. The date. Scorpion.

"I have to warm the others," Shifu said to himself. He tried to move but couldn't feel his...anything.

"Hehehehehehehehehe..." Scorpion lept down infront of him a wide cocky grin spread on her face, "Noticed my paralysis venom have we now?You can whisper to yourself but can't move an inch. Good luck calling for help. Sorry, but I couldn't let you interfer with their date. Kinda ruin my plan..."

Shifu struggled to move anything but failed once again. He yelled at her in vioce that was diluted by the venom. She was right, yelling for help would do no good. Not unless someone was listening for even the smallest of sounds. Besides he didn't even know where he was.

"What sort of plan would involve a catnip cologne!"

She chuckled, "For one thing it distracts both your daughter and the panda, but distraction isn't all that I have in mind. You see catnip isn't the only thing I added to the cologne."

Shifu's eyes went wide, "_What. Did. You. Add._"

Scorpion chuckled, "It's something quite special actually...a very unique reaction of herbs that very few healers know of. Oh, I won't bore you over what plants make this sort of reaction. But I will tell you what this reaction causes. While the catnip does cause your daugher to act...affectionate toward the panda this other plant has a slow reaction with the catnip. It increases the aroma of the catnip ten-fold alowing it to affect a certain other species."

It clicks in Shifu's head, "Pandas!"

Scorpion nods, "Exactly! By that time part of the aroma will have been rubbed on the tiger causing him to act just as she is. Then comes the third reaction..."

Only one thought entered Shifu's mind, Oh dear...

**Kung Fu Panda**

Tigress had pulled Po down the thousands steps and into the valley babbling about "how cute he was" and "how awesome and bodasious he was" which was making the black and white panda black and red.

"Remember how awesome you were on your first day," Tigress giggled at the memory.

"_Awesome_? I completely failed my first day!"

"But you failed awesomely!" she squealed. Great. She was now acting like a psycho fangirl. And it was beginning to scare him.

She jerked him into the valley, oblivious to the stares they were given as they passed. Tigress seemed to know exactly where she wanted to go.

"Where are we going?" Po asked, blushing at a lot of the coments and rumors being spread.

"To your dad's shop, silly."

"Right...What! Why?"

Tigress spoke to him like a parent would a five year old who was slow, "We're going to tell him about us, silly."

_"Us!_ We haven't even gone out on a first date yet!" Po clamped a paw over his mouth, truely afriad of how she would react to his outburst.

"Sniff, sniff..."

What he didn't expect was her to start crying-bawling actually. More tears than he thought was possible for any person-exceptialy Tigress-to shead were pouring down her cheeks.

"Y-you wan-na br-hic-eak up-hic- r-rig-ht..." Tigress blubbered. She was gathering a lot of attention. A lot, a lot of attention. After the watchers got over the shock that Master Tigress was crying, they glared at Po since he had made her cry. Some whispered what a jerk he was and how he didn't diserve the title of Dragon Warrior.

Gotta fix this, he though to himself. "Tigress, Tigress! Please stop crying! I'll do anything! Shhh...shhhh...it's all right...see your..uh..boyfriend doesn't like to you cry. Cause I'm your boyfriend and your my...uhh...girlfriend..."

Tigress stopped crying when he said that he wsa her boyfriend and she was his girlfriend. He admitted it!

She tackled him in a hug, squealing.

_"Yeah! Come on, lets go! Lets go! Lets go! Lets go! Lets go! Lets go!"_ she yelled, pulling him toward the noodle shop.

This is gonna be a looong date...

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><p><strong>Whatcha think? Like, dislike, blah! Review please!<strong>

**Uh oh...**

**Okay, um, readers listen up. Don't panic but, uh, catnip crazy Tigress might have just, ummm, escaped from this story!**

**If you see her bring her back! You might have to tranquilize her first but bring her back alive!**

**Beware! **


	5. Chapter 5--re-edited

**Author note: I own nothing! Sorry that I've been on hiatus** **so long. Honestly I've been busy with school and some writer's block and—I'll admit—plain ole` laziness. So, again sorry. I've been rereading my previous chapters and I may reload them after fixing some grammatical and spelling issues. And that one time I accidentally started typing exactly what I was thinking. I'm going to take my writing much more seriously now since I plan on majoring in it in college. So anyway here we go!**

**Oh…and one more IMPORTANT thing this story will have two alternate endings. One will be set during LOA time (in between the first and second movies) and another one to be set after the second movie (TiPo ending). So one will have a comedic ending and one will have a romantic ending. **

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><p>"Oh, I especially like the third reaction. Hehehehe…"<p>

"Spit it out already, woman!" Shifu hoarsely snapped. He was sick of Scorpion's gloating demeanor. _What I wouldn't give to…grrrr_

"Okay, okay, okay, okay…don't blow your stack. Yeesh… Okay the final reaction toys with the mind a bit…It affects both of them and soon after the Panda begins to be affected by my little herbal 'cocktail' they'll have an uncontrollable urge to eliminate the current object of their affections. Hahahahaha…"

"_You're going to them kill each other! _

"I just said that, didn't I?"

"You sick, twisted, demented, egocentric—_"_

"Why thank-you for noticing. Well, now I'll be off. I don't want to miss the feature presentation." With that Scorpion left, and Shifu had only a single though go through his mind.

_I have to stop her!_

As loud as he could he yelled, albeit hoarsely, "I won't let you take my daughter away from me!" _or the Dragon Warrior, _he thought in his mind, but didn't say that out loud.

**Kung Fu Panda**

"Po!" Mr. Ping yelled when he saw his son enter the crowded noodle shop. This immediately grabbed the attention of everyone with Dragon Warrior Noodles and Tofu.

_Great… _"Hey, Dad." While Po would've loved to see his dad, he just didn't want to see his _today_. Not with Tigress acting so…so…hormonal.

"What brings you to the Valley today my boy?" It was them that he saw Tigress, who was clamped to his son's arm for dear life. It was like she thought she might never see him again if she let him go.

Po could see the wheels turning in his dad's mind. Po knew that, between Tigress on this emotional high and his dad being himself, this would not end well.

"Dad, let me expl—"

"My boy has a girlfriend!" he yelled for the entire Valley to hear. "Oh…they grow up so fast. Sniff—sniff…" Pulling a hankie from thin air Mr. Ping loudly blew his nose—loudly.

"Daaaad…" Behind him Tigress giggled, causing the patrons of the shop to make perplexed faces.

_Something's not right…Master Tigress, leader of the Furious Five, doesn't giggle…you're right…Are her and Master Po dating…looks like it…I heard rumors but I thought that they were just rumors._ Po could hear the whispers between the tables and with each new rumor and gossip more and more fur stood up when he thought about what she would do when he heard the rumors.

"Mr. Ping it's sooo good to see you. Po and I actually came here for our first date. Didn't Po?" Tigress looked up to the panda with her eyes wide and expanded. How he could say no to that.

"Right..." Po turned a light pink when Tigress nuzzled his shoulder.

"Ahhhh…young love…"

**Kung Fu Panda**

"Remind me why _I_ have to fix this wall?" Monkey stood before the wall he had somehow destroyed while making dumplings with some lumber and a hammer in his arms.

"Because you're the one who, somehow, managed to break the wall," Crane pointed out, picking up a bowl of rice cakes in his talons.

"Hey, don't be so negative about it. You could be the one on a date with Tigress," Mantis said, hoping out from the cupboard, giving up looking for a meal and instead deciding to wait until Po came back—if he came back at all—from his date.

_Slap!_

"Ouch!" mantis yelled at he pick himself off the floor. He could've Viper was in the other room

"That's not funny, Mantis!"

"Yeesh… Viper! It was a joke! Ever hear of them?"

Rolling her eyes Viper then noticed something.

"Have any of you seen Master Shifu recently?"

The guys looked at one another and shook their heads. No.

"Not since training."

"Same here—"

"—and here."

"Hmmmm…" Viper thought, "Do you think he knows about…errr…Po and Tigress?"

Mantis scoffed, "For Po's sake, I hope not."

"I don't think he'd do anything that ba…d…Okay, maybe he would." Viper sighed. Shifu and Tigress's father-daughter relationship was…complicated. There was no way of telling how Shifu would react. It might be anything from a lecture on not letting their relationship interfere with their training or their duty of protecting the Valley to Po being chased through the Valley a few times.

"Who knows? It's not like Shifu is an open scroll when it comes to this issu—"

…_I won't let you take my daughter away from me…_

…

The four looked at one another. All were wondering if they're trained hearing had actually heard that or if they were just letting the weirdness of the day get to them.

"Did any of you hear that, too?"

"Maybe…"

"Yeah?"

"That depends…what you hear?"

"A really soft voice saying—" Viper started.

"_I won't let you take my daughter from me…_" the four all said at the same time, continuing Viper's train of thought.

**Kung Fu Panda**

"What can I get for the happy couple?" Mr. Ping smiled at his son and his "date" after he had brought them to a more secluded area of the restaurant. Secluded meaning the only thing keeping the "love birds" away from were two rice paper dividers. Mr. Ping had added some candles and lanterns to their secluded area. On the outside a sign red: Private Party—access denied, in Chinese.

"…just two bowls of noodles, Dad."

"Thank you, Mr. Ping."

"Oh, Tigress I told you call me Dad. And besides I'd do anything for my son and _perhaps soon-to-be-daughter-in-law_." Mr. Ping nudged Po when he mentioned the idea of marriage. Po turned red.

"Perhaps indeed, Dad!" Tigress said. _Great, now she's pressuring me too._ Po turned even redder.

_I might end up married before this date ends…_

_Sniff…sniff-sniff._

"Are you catching a cold, Po?" Tigress looked at him with very concerned eyes.

"Huh, no Dad…it's just…can't you smell that?" Po asked. Strange…whatever it he smelled. It actually smelled really good.

Mr. Ping sniffed the air. "I don't smell anything other than the cologne you're wearing…a bit much, Po."

While Mr. Ping left to get their food, Po turned to Tigress. "Do you smell anything?"

"Just you my panda." Tigress grinned. "Come one Po. Relax. Isn't that what you've been trying get me to do ever since you defeated Tai Lung? Did we switch personalities or something?"

"You're right it's probably noth…ing…" Taking in one last breath of…whatever that was, Po started to feel something. His head felt fuzzy for a moment and he spaced out.

"Po?"

Po's eyes softened when he heard her voice. He stopped caring about what the patrons were saying. He no longer cared._ Wow, Tigress looks so pretty when she's confused. Well, she's always pretty. Maybe this crazy day happened for a reason? Like Oogway said, Today is a gift. And I might as well enjoy it…right?_

"Po? Are you okay?"

"Just thinking…"

"About…"

"About how the name seems to work. Po and Tigress Ping."

Tigress's eyes lit up when she heard Po say that. _Finally he's getting into the spirit._ She grinned, "Hmmm…it does work. _Tigress Ping_! Ha! Rolls right off the tongue, doesn't it?"

Po grinned at the tiger and took her paw in his, smiling tenderly at her.

"Yes…it does."

Mr. Ping, who had been listening in on them from behind the counter, silently cheered, "I am going to be a grandfather!"

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><p><strong>Ohhhh…Mr. Ping…<strong>

**What did y'all think? Read and review. Sorry for the length. Constructive criticism is greatly wanted…needed actually.**

**Another thing, **

**I am Female**

**Fe: Iron & Male: Man**

**I am Ironman **

**Oh and catnip crazed Tigress is back and secured. Wait…what do you mean she escaped! Catnip crazed Po too! Man, I need a new security system!**

**Review please! Oh, and if you happen to see catnip crazed Po and/or Tigress please give them back. **


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